white fog

there is a blank sheet of paper in front of my window
i see no difference between the wall in my room and the window
i can't see outside
i feel my eyes have been covered up and i'm sheilded. What am I hiding from?
at times i think i can see it shifting but the paper lies thick
the whiteness brings with it the silence,
i can hear the ships struggling through their blindness
blindness to an outside i want to take part in, i want to see and experience
white
shadows moving
stillness
struggling
fear
fear of what can't be seen or known
if i open my window will it come inside? will i put out my hand and touch it? will i know when it's here? will it have a smell, a sense, a sound, a taste? will it catch me off guard and impose on me? will i find my way out?

noisufnoc

is it?

the direction of life...which way to go..how to turn...around and around...updown..hmm

does this make it better? does it solve the problems? it makes no sense...as does everything else.

how can i make it better? how can I see forward when I'm already here....

back, future...present?

up
up
up
up

circles, dizziness and blankness.